The weekly assembly of who is hot, mad, and just down on their luck in the sporting world

Lyle Morissette

Sports Editor

The Good

“The Dog Pound”: It’s not the Cleveland Browns’ fans, but rather a 14-bedroom, four-bathroom house near the campus of the Ivy League University of Cornell. Its residents include thirteen players from the program’s basketball team, as well as a team manager. Talk about a bonding experience! The house hosts everything from TV episode parties to video-game competitions, and it does not diverge from what you may find at any regular frat house or dorm room: empty pizza boxes and mounds of garbage. Clearly this bonding experience is working, as they recently won their third straight Ivy League Championship, upsetting two higher-ranked opponents during a strong showing at the NCAA’s March Madness National Championship tournament.

The Mad

Samuel Eto’o: The Inter Milan striker recently learned why most people don’t loan their €150,000 Bentley GT, or any other luxurious vehicle for that matter: good things don’t happen. Throw in a 20-year old teammate who has been labeled the “Austrian Cristiano Ronaldo” (in other words, a lady killer), and you are just asking for trouble. What happened? Well, the car was stolen while parked in the streets near the Sheraton Hotel in Milan, Italy. I wonder what he was up to… Hopefully Samuel has learned his lesson: never, ever lend a car that is worth more than most people’s homes out to a playboy teammate who does not need to focus on his “paid” job in hand.

The Downtrodden

Derrick Lee: Now, it’s never funny to laugh at other people’s misfortunes, especially when the person in question has had a laundry list of injuries in his career, but when it happens to occur after finding out the oft-injured Chicago Cubs star Derrick Lee recently was having a pregame meal when, out of nowhere, the chair he was sitting on collapsed, leaving him with a sore back and an embarrassment that seems all too similar to a common sight gag. The 34-year-old did play in the Cubs game that night, but left early to seek treatment for his back.